Three things determine a successful relationship: Money, Sex, and Love. So, you are in love, probably falling for each other head over heels. That’s great! Doesn’t that come with getting between the sheet occasionally? Sure, what a beautiful life. Sex, Check, Love, check. Now, let us talk about money.
How open are you on finances with your partner? Your guess is as good as mine. You should know, over 90% percent of all divorce cases in the U.S, money is usually the central factor. Being open about finances is a crucial ingredient to having a long-lasting relationship (Of course, you’ll argue ones in a while; you are only human). Here are the reasons why you should discuss money before you start living together.
There Are Bills to Pay
Love is expensive, you know. There are dates, gifts, and all manner of things done in the name of love. Let’s not even put in a budget for a wedding, which is customary before couples move in together. Besides, all these things cost money. Then when you start living together, here comes the expenses; rent, groceries, cable, car loan, among other expenditures.
Living together means one set of bills, and you will need to sit down with your partner and decides who will take care of what bill. It could be 50/50 or based on income. Anyways, the important thing is that you agree to split the bills. After all, it is a coalition of the willing. Then decides who will be responsible for paying them after each respective partner has made remittances to clear the pending bill.
Realistic Expectation
It is good to talk about money to keep the expectation of what you are getting yourselves into in check. You don’t want a situation where one of the partners expects a complete makeover once you move in together. Expecting a bigger house, a more significant car subscription to the local prestige club, dates every week, and other demands that drain the pocket.
Besides, when both of you know of each other’s financial status, you won’t expect such demands, probably due to envy. You will both live according to your means as circumstances allow with a hope for a brighter future. Please discuss with your partner on reasonable financial goals and expectations, keeping them realistic and not too far-fetched. Don’t promise a Lamborghini, and yet it will take a lifetime to have the same.
Honesty is the Best Policy
Where there is no trust, there is no love. A true who have the best interest for each other will be honest about their current financial situation. Don’t borrow money to take your partner on a date to impress. Be vulnerable and reveal all your sources of income to each other. It is our money, not your money anymore.
A relationship should be based on honesty, don’t just stop at revealing the sources of income, also talk about spending. Don’t keep quiet about your partner’s expenses that you find unnecessary. Agree to disagree on spending habits. Importantly, don’t let any issue become a big deal. Resolve it and look at a bigger picture.
To Figure Out an Exit Plan If Things Don’t Work Out
This is a dreadful topic. No couple wants to discuss the possibility of a breakup. Yet, the reality is, it happens, relationships do fail. Yes, you are both buried in love, but time changes everything. Love fades away, you know, you get used to the same person, many years down the road the person you married is not the person you are living with now.
It may not be pleasant, but it would be wise to try and discuss the same with your partner. In case you guys decide willingly to end the relationship, how do you split the wealth you’ve generated over the years: the money, the assets, and liabilities, among other things. If you do this, in the worst-case scenario, you’ll be glad you had this talk. You’ll avoid a lengthy court battle and separate peacefully like nothing ever happened.
Wrap Up
Moving in with your partner requires plenty of preparations beforehand. Having an open conversation about money with your partner will create a peaceful co-existence, and you will have made a step towards a successful relationship going forward.
